Search: the bloat

Landis Gets $1 Million From The BLOAT

by editors on April 21, 2018

In the continuing saga of the Biggest Liar Of All Time and his doping cluster bluster, the US Government has just landed a $5 million settlement from the BLOAT and whistle-blower (and now weed businessman) Floyd Landis got $1 million. The Atlantic has all the details. We’re not interested in much of this story. If you are, please click the link.

[Link: The Atlantic]


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The BLOAT Cameos In Music Video

by editors on January 28, 2015

It’s nice to see that the Biggest Liar Of All Time is keeping busy. This time he’s showed up in a video by Future User (Rage Against The Machine Bassist Tim Commerford’s project), according to a story in

The video itself depicts a young man mixing prescription medications into a smoothie to prep him for his rad ride across town via skateboard. When he’s not flipping ollies and grinding guardrails, he’s doing more drugs in public places and injecting himself with what are implied to be steroids in a grungy bathroom stall.

Then the BLOAT shows up leaving a nasty phone message in a Mellow Johnny’s kit. Nice work, BLOAT.

[Link: My San Antonio]

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The BLOAT Lie Official Trailer

by editors on October 7, 2013

As maybe one of you may know we have stricken the name of the BLOAT (Biggest Liar Of All Time) from our site because we don’t want to give or get any Google juice from the juicer, but here is a little clip that everyone will find compelling. And yes, we’re looking forward to seeing the BLOAT movie even though he has that ability to turn even the most awful crimes into building his now infamous legend. Guess there’s no way to get around it.

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The US Government Jumps On The BLOAT

by editors on April 24, 2013

lance-armstrongAccording to legal documents filed late last night (Tuesday, April 23, 2013) the United States Government has officially jumped on against the Biggest Liar Of All Time with a false claims suit, according to a story on

“The USPS paid approximately $40 million to sponsor the USPS cycling team from 1998 to 2004,” the court document says. . . The government said it was intervening to recover triple the amount of the sponsorship funds under the False Claims Act, which could bring a total of more than $100 million in damages.

Well, if the BLOAT was worried that he didn’t have anything left to fight for, this should keep him on point for a while. To read the entire US Gov’s complaint click here.

[Link: CNN]

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The Bloat Says Yes On Dope

by editors on January 18, 2013

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Will The BLOAT Confess To Oprah?

by editors on January 8, 2013

20050920 103-318X408That former Tour de France winner we’ve renamed the BLOAT (biggest liar of all time) will reportedly sit with Oprah Winfrey for a 90 minute interview airing on Thursday, January 17, 2013 on the OWN Network.

In the interview, Winfrey speaks with Armstrong at his home in Austin, Texas in the only interview since the seven-time Tour de France winner was stripped of his titles and dropped from millions of dollars in endorsement deals after the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency released an extensive report accusing the renown cyclist of doping throughout his career.

The good news is that the BLOAT may come clean on his past, the bad news is no one is watching the OWN network.

[Link: Oprah via Paved Mag]

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Kent England Sets Up A BLOAT Effigy

by editors on October 31, 2012


Yes, it’s 30 feet tall, and it does look like the BLOAT and he’s going to burn tonight in Kent, England thanks to the Edenbridge Bonfire Society because they burn someone every year and this year it’s the BLOAT.

A 30ft (9m) model of the American, who was stripped of his seven Tour de France titles for doping offences, will go up in flames in Edenbridge. . . The Jim’ll Fix It badge is in reference to TV presenter Jimmy Savile who is suspected of widespread sexual abuse. . . Radical cleric Abu Hamza and Chancellor George Osborne were also considered.

We think they chose the right guy for this one. . .

[Link: BBC via Reddit]

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Specialized, Lance Armstrong & VeloNews

by editors on July 21, 2020

While doing a little web cruising this morning, wondering whatever happened to some old media friends, we stumbled onto a press release from June 30, 2020 suggesting that Specialized and The Biggest Liar of All Time (aka BLOAT aka Lance Armstrong) have joined forces to possibly control the cycling narrative through media ownership.

Here’s how it goes: VeloNews (and Bicycle Retailer) owner Pocket Outdoor Media just purchased a boat load of “media” titles from another media/events company called Active Interest Media. Not that cyclists should care, but the titles Pocket purchased include: Warren Miller Entertainment, Ski Magazine, Backpacker, Climbing, Yoga Journal, Vegetarian Times, and more.

This got more interesting when Pocket Outdoor Media listed where they got the money to grab the titles. It came from a “Series A” round of funding from three different venture capital groups, namely JAZZ Venture Partners, NEXT VENTŪRES, and Zone 5 Ventures.

Who are these venture firms? Well, JAZZ is a bunch of neuroscience medical start-up brainiacs based in San Francisco, Next Ventures is the BLOAT and friends (yes, he still has some), and Zone 5 Ventures is Specialized’s early-stage investment arm which is run by former and current employees at Specialized.

We haven’t had reason to follow anyone from JAZZ, but before starting Next with the BLOAT managing partner Lionel Conacher was a senior advisor and operating partner at Altamont Capital Partners, LLC which has large stakes in the Billabong, Brixton, Fox (head), HUF, and Dakine brands. Lance’s other partner at Next is Melanie Strong, the former Nike vice president and general manager of Nike Skateboarding.

So why are all these corporate jocks suddenly interested in the action sports media world in general and cycling in particular? Is it because in these COVID times the only thing any of us can do is spend time outside? Is it because distressed action media brands are currently a bargain? Or is it because (as we suspect) The BLOAT and Specialized want to own the cycling narrative from beginning to end?

How do you feel about getting all your cycling news from Specialized and The BLOAT? It doesn’t feel all that good to us. Makes it even more difficult to know what to believe, doesn’t it? For instance, how long will this story on Specialized’s silly trademark lawsuit stay up on the VeloNews website? Click the link to see if it’s still there. 

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Tour de Pharmacy Junk Show

by editors on May 22, 2017

Wow. After watching this clip from HBO’s Tour De Pharmacy we really wonder if we’ll be able to make it though this film with any laughs at all. Seeing the BLOAT (biggest liar of all time) try to joke his way out his disgracing his sport is probably the most painful part. Yes, cyclists take themselves way too seriously, but this just looks like a junk show phoned in by everyone involved. Makes us wonder if there are any laughs in the movie? The BLOAT’s final line in the trailer likely sums it up well, “This is not good.”

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Wiggins Claims His Doping Was Different

by editors on September 26, 2016


It is hilarious listening to Bradly Wiggins defend his “UCI approved” use of performance enhancing drugs in an interview Sunday with the BBC. In a story on the interview on Cycling Tips, he is quoted explaining why his use of performance enhancing drugs was different from many others (including the BLOAT) who were caught using Triamcinolone acetonide.

“It was prescribed for allergies and respiratory problems,” he told journalist Andrew Marr on BBC television on Sunday morning. “I’ve been a lifelong sufferer of asthma, and I went to my team doctor at the time. We went in turn went to a specialist to see if there’s anything else we could do to cure these problems.”

Doping is doping. We agree with what Tom Dumoulin said in a story in The Advertiser regarding medical exemptions to banned performance enhancing drugs:

“It’s not something they do with normal asthmatics, let alone athletes who only have exercise-induced asthma,” Dumoulin said. “Apparently Wiggins’ injection worked for weeks — so in my opinion you should be out of competition for weeks. It stinks.”

Exactly. Anything else is doping by dopers and Wiggo (and Froome) should probably be treated just like everyone who had an unfair, drug-induced advantage. For more, please click the links below.

[Link: Cycling Tips & The Advertiser]

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